Monday, September 28, 2015

The Spider in the Toilet

This is a Blush Spider, scientifically known as Arachnius gluteus. In other words, the Butt Spider. According to the email going around, five Florida women with seemingly no connection all had the same symptoms. They all had fevers, chills, and vomited a lot, followed shortly after by muscular collapse, paralysis, and death.

The autopsies showed no injuries to the body that would entail death, though their blood had a high level of toxins. When looking into the women's days since symptoms began, they all frequented the same restaurant. The airport eatery was shut down, but no sign of toxins were found anywhere inside.

Later, a woman went the hospital with the same symptoms. When asked, she revealed that she went to the restaurant to pick up her check and use the restroom. With that, the CSI unit looked under the toilet lid and found the South American Blush Spider. It is in the same family as the Black Widow, but only bites when feeling threatened.

Basically, it only bites your butt if you invade it's home, the toilet. After this, a man went to the hospital, matching symptoms, and revealed the plane all the victims were on. A sweep of all planes to and from South America at the airport found four planes had these spiders living in their toilets.

Now, these spiders could be in any public restroom, in any part of the country, possibly the world! So, watch your butt.

1 comment:

  1. The women's fates fre tragic but seriously, why live in a toilet and bite someone's butt just because it feels threatened🤣🤣🤣